View Full Version : To be scammed or not to be scammed
San070
03-31-2003, 08:15 PM
I don't know anymore.
For a while now I write emails to a girl in Ukraine and she writes back to me. There are a few items that make me wonder if I'm not dealing with a scammer.
First, most of the letters she sends are about how wonderful it will be and how much she thinks of me, written in a way that they could be meant for anyone. She answers my questions if they are not personal, but if they are, she ignores them most of the times. The same goes when I ask for an address or telephonenumber, completely ignored. It happened several times now that I received the same letter twice, she gives the excuse that her sister sent the wrong letter (again, a letter so general, it could be for anyone she wants to conquer), while she did't have the time to send it. She never directly asked for money, but once mentioned she was mugged for $ 40 she has had as birthdaypresents and she had hoped to buy a pair of new boots.
I think I know the answer already, but if anyone has suggestions. I don't really want to discover it is a scam.
Raven
03-31-2003, 11:49 PM
I have not used these services myself but there are different agencies that can probably help you! One is
www.flowers-russia.com. From there, you can send a flower and have them take a picture of the reciever, so you can see if the girl really exists. And then there are different detective bureau and so on that can do background checks and so on. You should be able to find some on the net. I cannot tell you what to use as I haven't used one yet! But I wish you good luck in whatever you chose!
Serge
04-01-2003, 12:18 AM
I don't know anymore.
For a while now I write emails to a girl in Ukraine and she writes back to me. There are a few items that make me wonder if I'm not dealing with a scammer.
First, most of the letters she sends are about how wonderful it will be and how much she thinks of me, written in a way that they could be meant for anyone. She answers my questions if they are not personal, but if they are, she ignores them most of the times. The same goes when I ask for an address or telephonenumber, completely ignored. It happened several times now that I received the same letter twice, she gives the excuse that her sister sent the wrong letter (again, a letter so general, it could be for anyone she wants to conquer), while she did't have the time to send it. She never directly asked for money, but once mentioned she was mugged for $ 40 she has had as birthdaypresents and she had hoped to buy a pair of new boots.
I think I know the answer already, but if anyone has suggestions. I don't really want to discover it is a scam.
Oh ho San. I don't know about anyone else here but the scammer bells are going off here. Why wouldn't a woman who is interested inn you give you at least her phone number? and if she wants you to be interested in her, why would she not answer your questions? My guess is that she wants boots now, but if you play along she'll want a Mercedes soon eneugh http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif Tell her that you lied and really are a poor cabbage farmer and see if she writes back http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
katya
04-01-2003, 03:31 PM
Dear boys. Look at you and understand
San070
04-01-2003, 09:25 PM
It was not after 4 - 6 letters that I asked her address, it was after about 3-4 weeks of writing each other every day and again after 3 months of writing. Thats another thing, she uses an internet-cafe, she wrote, and still she is able to write almost every day (at least 5 times a week, sometimes more). I've read stories about the costs of those places, is an ordinary girl able to pay those amounts of money?
By the way, she knows I'm not a rich man, not even well-provided.
[QUOTE= (katya @ April 01 2003,08:31)]Dear
Vicky
04-01-2003, 11:27 PM
Couple of thoughts about phones and addresses.
I wonder, San, if you ever asked her straight why she doesn't want to give you her address. Do this and tell us if you want of course how she will explain it to you. Otherwise we may give you tons of possible comments and none of them might be correct.
About phone calls - i still don't understand what's the use in calling if a girl speaks little or no English at all. Secondly, how can you be sure the person who picks up the phone is the one you write to? Even if you call every day there might be a person sitting, answering dozens of calls like this. If the girl speaks poor English you all the same won't be able to check if this is the right person by trying to be personal with her, asking what was written in your last letter or anything else.
And i highly recommend you to ask your girls any "why" questions if you suspect she's not telling you the truth. Who knows she might have her reasons, which you might understand as well if you ask her to explain. One note - do it in the way that she doesn't think you suspect her in scamming. If she's not a scammer that'll be the end of relations.
this might be the right time for a quote i recently used in an essay i wrote for uni about military conscription............................."love by letter is like lunch by telephone"...enough said http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif liam
katya
04-02-2003, 05:07 PM
Hi!
I
katya
04-02-2003, 05:09 PM
You make me smile http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Who will give you phone ? go at street to girl, and ask
[QUOTE= (katya @ April 02 2003,10:09)]And, interesting, do
San070
04-03-2003, 12:40 AM
She has a computer at the office where she writes her letters. The usual excuse for sending the same letter multiple times is that she had no time and her sister sent it, taking the wrong letter from the disk. I will try again, I will ask in an innocent way for her phone-number again. I suspect she will ignore my request completely, as before.
By the way, she told me she speaks a little english. I think I can see the difference between an automatic translator and a genuine try at writing in english and sometimes I get a short letter in what I think is her own text. Most of the times though it is the automated translator, so she probably won't speak english too well.
San070
04-03-2003, 12:47 AM
I know six words in russian and english is not my native language either, so I suppose an automated translator will probably have some difficulties with my mistakes as well, making it even harder.
Serge
04-03-2003, 02:59 AM
She has a computer at the office where she writes her letters. The usual excuse for sending the same letter multiple times is that she had no time and her sister sent it, taking the wrong letter from the disk. I will try again, I will ask in an innocent way for her phone-number again. I suspect she will ignore my request completely, as before.
By the way, she told me she speaks a little english. I think I can see the difference between an automatic translator and a genuine try at writing in english and sometimes I get a short letter in what I think is her own text. Most of the times though it is the automated translator, so she probably won't speak english too well.
Hi San...It's really none of my busness but there are some things that come to mind when I read your post.
1) Why is her sister reading correspondence that should be private?
2) Why was there a letter already written but not sent? This tells me that she uses form letters. It would have been easy to send the letter from work once it was composed. Why is her sister involved?
What I have done in the past when I have questions or doubts, is be very direct but polite. I think the sincere women will understand that trust is a big issue and will address your concern. A scammer will be more evasive I think.
Best of luck!
serge
[quote=sean,April 01 2003,15:04]
You
San070
04-03-2003, 09:15 PM
Like I said, the request for her phone number was completely ignored.
To Serge: @1: I think it is a matter of trust and friendship. I agree it can show a lack of interest in privacy, but it can also show complete trust and close friendship with her sister (which would make it difficult, almost impossible, for her to leave). @2: I know enough (small) companies here in the advanced west, who share one email-connection to the outside world. (Yes, I offered my help in arranging a proper network, but they were not interested enough to be willing to pay for it).
To Sean: It is nice to be able to talk to a girl in Russian, but what if she comes from Ukraine or Kazakhstan, you will need to learn another language. Yes, I know she will probably speak Russian too, but it will not be her native language. I know I will be able to learn a language good enough to handle myself within a few weeks, certainly when I am surrounded with it. Ok, I will need help, but if a girl wants to maintain herself in my country, she needs to speak at least a little English.
Vicky
04-03-2003, 11:08 PM
Unless the girl was born couple of years ago, it doens't matter whether she's from Ukraine or Kazakhstan or Russia - she will speak and understand Russian, and actually this will be her native language, since it was official and the only one language through decades, so one doesn't need to worry he'll have to learn the Ukrainian language.
And San's knowledge of Russian truly impresses.
And San's knowledge of Russian truly impresses.
Vicky if you mean me with "San", do I see a little bit of sarcasm ?
Vicky
04-04-2003, 11:16 AM
Sorry, Sean,
missed the letter http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif And i meant what i wrote http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
katya
04-04-2003, 04:25 PM
About sister
MartinUK
04-11-2003, 12:08 AM
San,
First step should be to go to www.womenrussia.com/blacklist.htm and see if you can find her there. Next, do a google.com search for 'Russia blacklist' for other such sites.
If she isn't already blacklisted then it would appear she would be a first time scammer, don't be fooled, there are very many first timers but suggest checking the blacklists, should also try a google search of her name and/or city.
Olgakazakevich
04-14-2003, 07:12 AM
Scammers, scammers, scammers once again. If you have idea that the girl is nit real , come to Russia and see yourself. If the meeting is not successful you meet a lot of other people, may be even your dream.
And at the other hand, will you really suffer if you send the girl 20-30$. I have never asked for money, but I am the other thing. But young girl living without parents , getting only scollarship, she earns 10-20 / month, are you hearing it for the first time? So if you have any trust and feel sympathy to her face and letters, do not be so suspecious, send her the money. It is nice if you call her before, may be you will get idea if she is real or not.
Even if she makes 0 $ a month. What can I expect from a girl that asks me for money in the 2nd letter ? Serious Russian girls are very proud as I mention in one of my postings before. This is an experience that I made not only once.
Besides many of these girls asking for money work together with some
Vicky
04-14-2003, 04:11 PM
I back up sean in this issue, and assume that if a poor student writes to men as if she's trying to find a husband but makes it clear in the secon
katya
04-14-2003, 05:40 PM
Sean, I was smile http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
I have the Bat too , I think , that it is very comfortable program. It save my time , and save my letters ;)
I like it . Outlook express isn
Vicky
04-14-2003, 07:51 PM
[QUOTE= (sean @ April 14 2003,21:06)]Haaaaaa......
[QUOTE= (Vicky @ April 14 2003,13:51)][QUOTE= (sean @ April 14 2003,21:06)]Haaaaaa......
Vicky
04-14-2003, 11:08 PM
Allow me just an interjection then http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Hmm... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
[QUOTE= (Vicky @ April 14 2003,17:08)]Allow me just an interjection then http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Hmm...
don't worry katya http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif when interpol sends you off to jail for copyright fraud i'll send you some chocolate http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif liam
katya
04-15-2003, 05:30 PM
[QUOTE= (sean @ April 14 2003,12:06)]Haaaaaa......
Katya, I lived two years in Switzerland. You watch too much TV. It is a nice country, but you have to understand the way people are there. You as a Ukrainian or Russian "devushka" ?
-- I doubt it very much. I think instead you would prefer "Gulag" or Srednekolymsk. Instead of chocolate I send you a good bottle of Vodka against the could. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
katya
04-15-2003, 06:28 PM
.................................................. .....................
.................................................. .....................
Ok Katya, from today on your second firstname will be Heidi !
When you go to Zürich, may I borrow the keys of your appartment in St. Petersburg ?
Katya, this site is not able to display some letters. I ment :
when you go to Zuerich...
katya
04-16-2003, 05:40 PM
Look, boys. if it is funny to you , we have different opinion on humor.
[QUOTE= (sean @ April 15 2003,11:51)]
Look, boys.
Well, there are scammer out there, for sure, one girl was all nice and then she started asking me to send her money because at the internet cafe she used it costed money, I was like, "Oh really?"
And one girl all her letters were basicaly the same thing week after week, when can we meet, blah blah blah, I would ask specific questions, and she would send the same letter from the other day with more pictures of herself, then she was like "Oh I need 400 bucks becuase they are threatening to kick me out of my apartment." when I didnt send the money she never wrote back?
Whats the old say, if it looks to good to be true, it probably is?
katya
04-19-2003, 04:46 PM
If girl have her own flat, nobody can expel her, even is she debtor.
If she haven
katya
04-19-2003, 04:47 PM
[QUOTE= (sean @ April 16 2003,12:36)]Katya, I know my humour kills you. But look, with a little smile on your beautiful face you are even more beautiful than you are without any doubt, from nature. Besides imagine that such a charming lady like you shows an extra portion of tolerance
[QUOTE= (katya @ April 19 2003,10:47)][QUOTE= (sean @ April 16 2003,12:36)]Katya, I know my humour kills you. But look, with a little smile on your beautiful face you are even more beautiful than you are without any doubt, from nature. Besides imagine that such a charming lady like you shows an extra portion of tolerance
katya is definately indeed a foxy little devil http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif .........
seany seany seany..nice guys come last................even on the internet http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif liam
[QUOTE= (liam @ April 19 2003,17:27)]katya is definately indeed a foxy little devil http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
katya
04-21-2003, 06:25 PM
Laim, about devil
katya
04-21-2003, 06:26 PM
Sean, why you think , that I need in tolerance ?
And how it must be looking ?
Apathetic
JohanHDrent
05-11-2003, 06:16 PM
Goodday!
With great interest I readed the discussion on this site about ladies who are scammers.
Of course I am sure that there are a lot of them, but I also am sure that a lot of men are the same.
When I ask you, are you really ready to share everything with your future wife, so that she is equal, have the same rights, and I mean really the same rights.......
A shared bank account, everything belongs to both of you, then I am sure that a lot of men don't want that at all.
It is just difficult for european men to find a nice woman here, because a lot prefer USA, I think they see a lot about it on tv.
It is pitty that they don't know the real things over there, otherwise a lot would look for there men in some countries of
west europe.
I have Russian friends living here in my country, and they didnot leave everything behind because life is so good there,
I think we would all do the same in such situation, but be honest and treat the girls with respect!!!!
And guys when you are be scammed, then I think it is your own fault! When I write you some letters and ask for several hundreds of dollars, would you send them to me? No.....
So why do you do that to a girl who ask you......
Johan
katya
05-15-2003, 07:01 PM
You know.. I am not agree with you. A lot of girls will prefer Europe. First
That was very good Katya !!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
As far as scamming goes, it happened to me about 2 years ago, it was my fault. But you know what they say about hindsight (20/20). I'm over it, but more cautious now than before. It's a shame that the world works that way, but crooks have an easier time scamming people when they are vulnerable.
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