View Full Version : Muscovites or... any preferences?
Maroossia
11-05-2002, 08:33 PM
Hi Everybody!
I'm pretty new here (as to own postings), but been reading other's posts for some time.
Just a few words to introduce myself: I'm 25, I live in Moscow, and I'm looking for my special man (like most are here http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif )
My point (first one of the few to follow - hopefully):
1) It is well-known that girls (and people generally) living in other regions of Russia, have a strong disliking for Muscovites. Well, it's justified to an extent - Moscow has a better (much better) standard of living, girls are more spoiled, people are more arrogant (things like regional dialects, manners, naivety, or whatever do seem ridiculous at times - not actually my opinion, a research's been made...), etc.
2) From the manyfold scam-posting sites and forums it can be easily seen that very few scammers actually come from Moscow...
So here comes the question itself.
Does it make any difference to a man if it's Moscow or elsewhere (given that you take into consideration the above mentioned issues)?
AND
Could a foreign man ever think that a girl from elsewhere might be a better soulmate?
I'm not sure if there's the same attitude to capital citizens in other FSU republics (like Ukraine, Byelorus, etc.), but if so, please speak out.
I would appreciate both gentlemen and ladies speaking their minds on the topic.
Thanks for your attention. Sorry for taking your time.
Hoping for response.
Maroossia
Hi Maroossia,
I myself, do not care where the person is from. I am more interested in who she is then what city she is from.
I am from Canada, I don't believe that women who are from FSU are "better" then Canadian women (or any other country). I just believe that my soulmate does not live in my hometown (although I won't stop looking). I believe that FSU women share many of the same values that I cherish, many have the qualities that I look for in a person, but most of all, many are willing to explore the possibility of a relationship with someone who does not live in or near their city. It is my personal opinion that this willingness is the greatest distinction from the women of the Western world.
So if I can't find my soulmate in my city, and I am not willing to move from city to city in the hope that I may find her. Then I will look where I am most likely to find someone like her. I believe that the FSU is such a place, but I will not exclude anyone simply because they come from somewhere else.
In regards to scammers, certain regions are more renowned for scammers then others. Does that mean that I won't consider someone from that region? No, but I would be a fool if wouldn't be that much more vigilant.
Hope this help,
Lou
Maroossia
11-06-2002, 08:58 AM
Thanks, Lou.
Good point!
But then let's put it this way - perhaps it's also the man's cultural and intellectual background that matters.
I've read a posting here where a man shared his love story with a Thai girl - they were unable to communicate properly because of her extremely poor English, but his vivid description of her exceptional appearance, skin of silk, long beautiful hair, the way she moved, etc., made me think that he didn't actually need a SOULmate, just a piece of meat (though a beautiful one) who would not talk much (or at all), be submissive, tender, affectionate, just someone to have sex with and to be proud of when you walk along the street (however, this would become boring soon?). For this very man it's enough... Would this fact speak of him as of a narrow-minded one?
I don't know - maybe this can be called snobism, but there are men (quite a lot of them) who would prefer a good communicator, a lady with whom they can discuss and share most of their interests, a true friend - for such men the lack of intellect or language command will soon become a serious obstacle for developing a deeper relationship.
I'm not trying to say that girls from Russian regions are less educated, less sensitive, less cultured, or whatever - I know lots of cases about the so called "diamonds in the raw", I believe you understand what I'm talking about. It's just a generalized opinion that girls living in big cities can be concidered more advanced in all senses.
Oh, by the way, here I've also read a few times something like "even men from Moscow know that the best girls live elsewhere but Moscow". Believe me, it's not true. Men from Moscow usually avoid girls from elsewhere - there are many reasons for this, beginning with the notorious Moscow registration, fear of gold-diggers, etc. Again, only those men from Moscow would seek a girl outside Moscow, who want a very modest, unpretentious girl (well, you may say "unspoiled" - but that's another discussion), but such girls can be found in Moscow as well...
Here comes your point, Lou, - if a man stated for himself that his special lady lives - next door, in some other city, overseas, or maybe just in his dreams - then he will go exactly where he expects to find her, and look there, and choose from what he has there.
It's like many girls in the FSU - they just choose a country ("I want to go to America, or Switzerland" - which is very popular now - in Moscow, "or Australia....") and she looks in this very country...
A long posting it is! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Please mind that my personal opinion is not necessarily the same as the above, I'm just trying to push it up and keep the discussion going http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Any other comments?
G'day,
I don't really believe that intellectual/cultural barriers make a very big difference, if anything with the right attitude and patience they can only really make life more exiting and interesting. eg. out of all my friends in new zealand there are none of us too similiar, one of closest friends is a girl from the slums of brazil, another an actress and another a pseudo gangster. Everyones really quite different, but you can learn and develop heaps, have a great time and progress in the world. For me it does'nt matter where a girl comes from if theres a spark that'll do for starters, there rest will come if its right.
liam
Hello Maroossia,
You wrote:
</span>But then let's put it this way - perhaps it's also the man's cultural and intellectual background that matters.
I've read a posting here where a man shared his love story with a Thai girl.. Would this fact speak of him as of a narrow-minded one?<span =''>
</span>...maybe this can be called snobism, but there are men (quite a lot of them) who would prefer a good communicator...<span =''>
</span>...I'm not trying to say that girls from Russian regions are less educated, less sensitive, less cultured,...<span =''>
</span>...only those men from Moscow would seek a girl outside Moscow, who want a very modest, unpretentious girl ...<span =''>
Hmmm...I might be misssing something here but it seems to me that all of these comments are what my psych 101 professor used to call "incendiary" quotes, they were meant to cause offense with someone in a public group, enough to feel outrage and create a spectacle. Think of the American Trash TV Talk shows like Springer etc...
</span>Please mind that my personal opinion is not necessarily the same as the above, I'm just trying to push it up and keep the discussion going http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif<span =''>
If they are not your personal opinions, then why are you posting statements that many would find offensive? Are you doing a research paper? What is the purpose of the discussion? Are you trying to debate the morality of the criteria's that human use for selecting a mate? Hey, it is a valid question and would make for a fascinating discussion but please be up front about it. Otherwise it would look like you are playing with other people's emmotions.
</span>Here comes your point, Lou, - if a man stated for himself that his special lady lives - next door, in some other city, overseas, or maybe just in his dreams - then he will go exactly where he expects to find her, and look there, and choose from what he has there.<span =''>
I did not say that my special lady lives in a particular place and I would choose from what I found there. I said that she does not live near me and I would look where I will most likely find her. To me there is a BIG difference between the two statements. If she is not there, I will look elsewhere.
Lou
G'day Lou,
I've done a uni paper spookily similair to psych 101. I'll leave this with you "Taking a new step, uttering a new word is what humans fear the most" (dostoyvesky), I say, 'good-on-you' Maroossia
Liam
Maroossia
11-07-2002, 01:24 PM
Hi again!
My point was not to create a spectacle nor to make offense on anyone. I know what you mean. We have a similar show in Russia (similar to Springer) - it's called "Windows" (Okna) and it's extremely popular. I personally don't like it because I don't believe that the people are real http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Neither am I familiar with the psych 101 theory or whatever it is...
Why I started this, I'll tell you a bit later.
Now, Lou, perhaps I missed something, but still for me it seems the same, no difference between the statements. Please tell me, do you know each and every girl in your home town, in some other town, state, in the neighboring US, to claim that your special lady does not live near you - I guess you do not... You keep looking in your area. But at the same time you know for sure that FSU girls share your values - that's the place to look in! Little difference, if at all...
Take me, for example. I've been totally disappointed in Russian men... And still I cherish a slightest hope and keep looking here, but I look elsewhere more seriously because everyday I receive confirmations for my disappointment - Russian women are the majority in the country, so Russian men can choose and they act accordingly - they don't keep the relationship, they drink, they search for something, they don't really know what they want, they just don't give a ####... So it's like I want to explore the possibility of a long-distance relationship, because I've never tried it and I believe it can be a success.
I live quite a decent life here, besides I know the language, familiar with the mentality and can easily get adjusted to a foreign environment (I think so). But all girls are different...
And men are different. Some realize what a great charity they do for a poor FSU girl who wants to flee from her poor unstable country ('I can take her to Turkey for a holiday, she will be delighted...'). I'm not saying you think so, but many do...
Now about cultural issues.
Liam, I've got a friend in NZ. He is male and he married an NZ girl. He's been there for about 3 years, and now he's a 3-year student at the Uni in Chch. Here's a couple of quotes from a letter if his:
"Also, another point is that I don't really have any obvious and
tangible connections with many Russians, and I don't really care, because I don't like to be identified as a Russian. The truth is that most people think that Russians are a bit wacky. I get this vibe when I meet people first when they ask me where I'm from. This is how it happens: say at Uni I'm in my computer lab, and somebody starts talking to me, just asking if I know how to do one of the assignments questions or something like that. Say I can help that person to sort the
things out. So, after that I've got a new aquintance. It might be some time before the person askes me where I'm from. So most kiwis kind of become a bit stiff when I say I'm from Russia. (But if it is a foreigner, like an Asian or Indian person they don't care much.) And then only after some time
if I keep taking to the person for some time they sort of relax when they can see I'm sort of an OK dude. I have a number of good kiwi friends who I study with and we help out each other, but not everybody here is relaxed enough to have Russian friends "
"Say if you are from some other country or if you
are a feemale, it is harder to find your way around. In reality it is not a very obvious thing, because there's supposed to be democracy here... But the thing is that there's so much discrimination here that sometimes even if your accent may seem strange to an employer when you are applying for a job,
you will be given some lame excuse instead of the job. The whole thing about this social status is deeply ingrained in the system. On a more simpler level, say at University it can be considered not cool to have friends among the immigrants."
How's that?
I think we should never forget about reality. Love matters are OK. And cultural differences bring excitement into love. The questions is how long the fire will burn (if it burns at all) after the first spark...
Now back to the purpose point. For a few years I worked at a marriage agency in Moscow. I just want to share my experience, perhaps help someone with advice or whatever...
I knew hundreds and thousands of women and I still remember their stories. Don't worry, I don'r represent any agency now - here I'm with my personal problem only.
It was natural that some ladies would find their soulmate, some not... But one of the curious things was that foreign men would often abandon ladies from Moscow for ladies from Lipetsk, Ryazan, Ivanovo, Yoshkar-Ola, etc...
Now you can judge me
Hello Marioosa,
Here is a quote you wrote that I would like to respond:
"And men are different. Some realize what a great charity they do for a poor FSU girl who wants to flee from her poor unstable country ('I can take her to Turkey for a holiday, she will be delighted...'). I'm not saying you think so, but many do..."
Do you really believe that we (western men) think FSU women want to flee from their poor unstable country? Do you honestly believe that if I (or some other guy) invites a woman from Ukraine or Russia to Turkey it is because we pity them or that we look down at them? Is my motivation to make my Ukrainian girlfriend love and respect me because of a vacation to Turkey?
Here is an excerpt from a letter my girlfriend wrote me today:
"
Hi Jon,
I agree with you when you say that many of us Western men do not think that we are there to save a women from an unstable country, but then we get to read this kind of stuff and see first hand why some FSU people think of us in that way. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif
</span>[QUOTE= ]
WENT TO ST. PETERSBURG, RUSSIA WITH AFA AND HAD A WONDERFUL TIME.
G'day Maroossia,
I'm really not so sure about 'social status' issues in nz, yeah theres definately some concerns but compared to the uk there really seems to be little or no 'class' structure. Saying that though, as a immigrant, it would definately help to be white, 'western'. Theres a lot of ingrained racism in nz but its pretty much limited to the treatment of maori/pacific island people. Theres a healthy respect between nz/oz/uk, sometimes it gets a little carried away but thats really only because all 3 nations are heavily into sport (cricket, rugby).
I'm not sure why your friend would find life a little difficult, I'm not sure if there would be any general 'opinion'/'stereotype' in relation to russians, theres very liitle about russia on tv except for when theres a disaster/terrorism. A year ago there was a russian boat, stranded in a port, the sailors had'nt been paid for months, there boat was confiscated so they were stuck. For about 4 months the local people fed, clothed, bought cigarettes, alcohol and generally made them all feel like they were part of the community, when they finally left for russia on a plane they were given money for there families from donations people on the street had given.
I asked my friend, sharka, a czech immigrant what she thought about nz and she loves it, she had very little opprtunity in czech even though she has a double degree, she was a teacher in czech and earned such a ridiculously low pay-check. One thing she really is passionate about though is the whole 'mail-order-bride' industry and the general treatment of women in eastern europe by western men looking for a wife. She's told me heaps of stories about the way men from germany/Austria drive over the border to czech, find girls and take them back, she's convinced a lot of the pretty, young girls end up as psuedo-slaves to rich, fat austrian men. Some of the dodgyest things i have ever seen with my own eyes are the border checkpoints between western/eastern europe were on the eastern sides a little before there checkpoints there are lines of young girls waiting for the men to drive over in there merc's, bmw's for sex for a couple of dollars, the men drive over get a quick 'blow' and drive back, they don't even need to get out of there cars.
There lives can be pretty much summed up with the following quote from napoleon 'ability is of little account without opportunity', i suspect that this has a lot do do with the whole russian women seeking western men question. And its a big shame.
On a lighter note if your friend ever finds himself in the North Island of nz let me know, we'll be happy to show him some good anglo/kiwi hospitality.
cheers, liam
Hi Maroossia,
</span>My point was not to create a spectacle nor to make offense on anyone. <span =''>
Ok, but you can see how several things that you said could be interpreted as offensive by those who do not live in Moscow. (no need to reply, it is rhetorical)
</span>Now, Lou, perhaps I missed something, but still for me it seems the same, no difference between the statements. Please tell me, do you know each and every girl in your home town, in some other town, state, in the neighboring US, to claim that your special lady does not live near you - I guess you do not... You keep looking in your area. But at the same time you know for sure that FSU girls share your values - that's the place to look in! Little difference, if at all...<span =''>
Ah! I think that I understand what you are saying, we are simply putting emphasis on different parts of the statement. You are saying that: I state that my special one does not live in my hometown (but that is not a fact but an opinion since I have not met all women in my hometown) but I will go where I thinks she may be. Yes, on this, the statements are the same. However, you conclude your statements with "and look there, and choose from what he has there." and "same time you know for sure that FSU girls share your values"
Maroossia
11-08-2002, 05:56 PM
To Jon
Right, actually it was a dig at you http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Sorry if I hurt you. But it was really weird to read such enthusiastic and detailed reports by you on how much money you spent on your girl
Hello Marioosa,
Please dig further and you will see something else, because you wrote:
"Of course, there could arise another question - why you have invited your girl to Turkey which every average girl can theoretically afford
katya
11-09-2002, 06:12 AM
</span><span =''>
Jon.. Simply interesting
Katya,
Why did I take Galina's mother? Good question and I still don't know the answer. Maybe because I thought it would be interesting. Probably because Galina thought it would be a good way to meet her mother. I can't meet the family in Ukraine because Daddy is an alcoholic and has a terrible temper. So its best to meet them outside the normal home setting. I've heard her father once screaming at Irina (Galina's mother) while I was on the telephone with Galina.
Will I ever take someone's mother on vacation again? NO!
Am I really interested in taking women all over the world just to spend time with them? NO!
Where is my next holiday? Kiev with my current girlfriend.
Galina knows about my current girlfriend and wishes me the best. She and I know that nothing will become of our friendship, except continued friendship. Should I tell my current girlfriend about my continued friendship with Galina? NO! Because she wouldn't understand and think something is going on. I agree with her and it would seem suspcious if my girlfriend kept in contact with her last boyfriend. I just don't know what to do. Maybe in time Galina will find another boyfriend and we won't have any further conversations. I asked her yesterday when she was going to start dating again and she wanted to wait until later. She had more important things to consider now.
Note: I had a couple of beers last night while writing the previous post. I feel stupid today after reading it because what I was saying didn't sound very mature. It really sounded like I was bragging. Actually, I was just thinking about how stupid I was for taking Galina to all those different places. So I guess my mistake was also a great learning experience.
Jon
Maroossia
11-09-2002, 11:13 PM
Hi Lou,
</span>I DON'T KNOW that I will find her there but I HOPE to find her there. If she is NOT there, I will NOT choose. <span =''>
I agree - that's wise... But what will your choice be if she's not HERE?
</span>[QUOTE= ]This brings me to the Psych 101 reference...
Maroossia
11-09-2002, 11:39 PM
Hi Liam,
Well, you 're right in your own way... But I'm sure my friend wouldn't point the problem out if it wasn't there. By the way, when he had just come to NZ, he worked part time for the hospital - interpreting for Russian sailors http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif And about half a year ago he told me a story which touched my professional interest - he had to interpret at hospital for a Russian girl who arrived to NZ as a bride and got an epileptic fit right before the wedding...
I heard something like you told us about the girls doing "blow job" for rich fat 'capitalists' on the border checkpoints... I believe you. But (though I know that you spoke not necessarily about Russians) this just makes me feel hurt for our Russian nation - the worst thing is that many people still mix FSU with Russia, so all the Ukrainian, Byelorussian, Moldovian, etc. prostitutes throughout Europe are just called 'Russian' - great, isn't it... And I often wonder for how long this chase for Russian brides will last... Russian girls' reputation is going down.... Is it possible that a day will come and no man would want a Russian bride?...
Thanks a lot for the Napoleon's phrase - I've been thinking about it, its really a problem here... But maybe our time has just not come yet... Anyway, zagranitsa nam pomozhet! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
I'll tell my friend about the opportunity to explore anglo/kiwi hospitality http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Maroossia
11-10-2002, 12:22 AM
Well, Jon...
I don't know if it was really the beer to blame... or something else, but you seem to keep stepping on one and the same rake, as we put it...
Again, 'I took her here, I took her and her mother there...', 'it cost so and so'. I had read your post about Dominican Republic, and I don't think I need to dig further here http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif I noticed that you chose countries that require no visa. THAT was my point - you just didn't want to bother too much for your girl. I didn't mean that you were going to take different ladies to go see the world with you http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif - which of course can be argued considering 'my current girlfriend', 'my ex-girlfriend', 'I ended the relationship' (btw, if you say this here, you should mention - why?) ...
I'm very sorry to say this - but you sound like you're having great fun with all this FSU girls stuff - not respectful,
Hi Maroossia,
</span>I agree - that's wise... But what will your choice be if she's not HERE?<span =''>
For me there is only one choice, I will continue to look elsewhere. Believe it or not, I would rather be by myself then marry someone just for the sake of being married. I'm 38, I have good friends, my family is close, I managed to live a pretty good life so far (a couple of relationships but never married). For me marriage is not something that must happen at all cost, there must be love and true friendship. Like you said we are all different.
</span>... still they are citizens of their own country... <span =''>
I understand your point of view.
</span>[QUOTE= ]Again Ukraine!!!...
katya
11-10-2002, 04:32 AM
</span><span =''>
Hi, Lou!
I think , that you was kill that girl with your question http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
asking girl about football and wait for answer ?
we telling , thet we like football only that time, when we love man , who like fotball , very much http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
and if serious - 3 days without answer - some girls , except writing letters to you , cooking , studying , working, clening , going to help - father-mother, grandmother-grandfathers .
and one more. last 3 days is holiday , on all country. We have a celebrate http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
girl can havn't computer at home , and internet cafe isn't working http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Hi Katya,
I think you misunderstood. My letter was not asking about football, my letter was asking about where she lived, what subject she was teaching, what were some of her hobbies, simple stuff like that (we just started to correspond). However, in that letter I did make a comment that the name Dinamo Wins was intriguing and asked if she was making a reference to the Kiev Dinamo's winning a match if so, did she liked football ? http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif I was curious since my understanding was that a large majority of women do not like football (I did not include this last sentence in my letter).
Personally, I do not like football, it is not very popular here. I'd rather watch Hockey (don't do much of that either, maybe 10 games during the season).
I am aware that 3 days without responding is not a lot, however she has been online (LavaLife) every day since then. I won't give up just yet, she may come back and say that she is sharing that email account with her brother/father/friend (email is different then LavaLife account). Or she may actually be a very rare female football fan http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif
Lou
Dear Maroossia, Beutiful name I must say.
I am a 34 year old man that lives in a city in Canada and i have always wanted a lady from Moscow or St Petersburg. I really don't know why but I can remember reading the personals when I was 16 and thinking that it would be great to be with a Russian Lady. I think that it may have something to do with your rich culture or maybe it was just an exotic thought. I would like to tell you that there are sites that tell men looking for ladies in Russia that the ladies in moscow and St. Petersburg are to be watched for signs of scamming. these stes say that most scams are run from the big cities.
I have looked at a few ladies from Moscow and thought that It's got to be a scam, the women were to beutiful and they said everything i ever wanted to hear in their profiles. i think that maybe men think the same and go for the lady in a remote area because they are intimidated and they want to go for a sure thing . Maybe the guys want to be able to impress the ladies and Know that the ladies from Moscow would be harder to impress.
Hello Maroossia,
Again you've raised some very valid points. All the BS about taking someone (and their mother) on holiday is a joke. That's not what life is about. Maybe it was something interesting at the time and we had an opportunity to learn more about each other, but it is expensive and not always in the best interests of both persons.
Now that I've gotten the truth out, sort-of, I can tell you that getting laid by FSU women hasn't (isn't) on the top of my list. I don't believe I ever said that it was important to me or that I had actually had sex with either of these women. Maybe it was something between the lines that you read. Never had sex on the first date which is usually at least 8-10 days together (long first date). The purpose of going to a neutral country is to get more exposure to each other that is not always possible in her home town. Take us away from our "comfort" zone and we behave differently. Its really easy to be on our best behavior at home. Its much more difficult to always be "good" when we are in such close quarters. Every little habit comes out and we can begin to see what we either like or dislike about the other person.
Respect. Ok, I address this simply by saying that it is important to treat "all" women with respect. Did I do something to give you the impression that I don't respect women? Sorry, but I am for equality of the sexes and believe that women and men are partners in everything. One can't be the boss without some feedback from their partner. We men in the west often take for granted that women are our equals. I don't and think that it is very important for women to have the same rights as myself. So respect can be seen differrently from an FSU womans point-of-view sometimes.
Why did I end my relationship with Galina? Well simply put she is too young for me. She needed to grow and experience life before she is ready for a serious relationship. I encourage her to live and find someone who can spend the time chasing a dream. Young women often run away from their problems and don't always work them out. As with Galina, she was always running away and after awhile I got tired of playing the game. I don't have time to wait for her maturity. I've got way too many plans for the future and it's a distraction to have a relationship that is always bouncing along.
I still say that its wrong for me to not tell my current girlfriend that I continue to speak with Galina. I'm just her friend and that's all there is to our relationship. I have no desire to start up the relationship again. Its just difficult to guit being a friend just because I don't love her the same way. I think of her as a little sister now.
You want to know something else. I think all the talk about buying this and that is a load of BS on my part. I'm just the opposite of what I've written. I don't like to spend tons of money on myself, but will gladly give what I have to help my friends and family.
I do also agree with you about the way men treat women at those "tours" and think its a joke. I don't believe its possible to meet someone for a couple of days and get en-gaged!!!
Why do you think I took so much time, effort, and money to learn about Galina? After almost two years and I still wasn't sure about marriage. Why? Because I take marriage and committment serious. I was married once for almost 18 years and was very devoted to the relationship. It just happens that we grew apart and our goals changed. Nothing drastic as adultery or gambling.
It was good to hear your views on my postings. I think that your views are refreshing and candid. Don't worry about why men perfer village women. Some men perfer blondes also. I did get some feedback from Galina about the women in Moscow which I think might help you understand why men perfer village (or small town women). She told me that most of the women she met in Moscow were "easy". What she meant was that having causual sex and different lovers wasn't a big deal to the women. That they expected men to buy them presents or they wouldn't go out with them She didn't like the men in Moscow because they were rude and crude in her opinion. She went on two dates and both times the men expected sex on the first date. If she refused then they became beligerent and cursed at her.
So that's the opinion of one Ukrainian woman who spent three months in Moscow. What can I say?
Jon
Maroossia I'd just like to add that alot of the men that go to Russia to get their wives can't get women here because they are fat , old, stupid , arrogant,etc. just look at Jon, he is betraying the trust of his new girlfreind because he calls his old girlfreind a freind boo hooo he is probable full of himself because he has a little money and now that he has lots of Ukranine women fawning over him, he has to keep all opportunities open because of his low self esteme. The guys that i am reading on this forum are pathetic and self absorbed. I don't know how the think they can take care of a Moscovite lady properly, they are to involved with themselves. I kam looking for a traditional wife , I mean one that believes in family first, not going out and drinking and snorting coke. i dohn't want a Russian lady for a maid i want as an equall partner. I offer to pay for the translations and I do , why be cheep about money when you are looking for love , be cheep with a prostitute if thats your gig guys. North American men will always go for the russian ladies, I have been looking since i was 16 and we were supposed to hate you. Funny how things change. I am a member on another site that has great forums and there is a guy that has, as his signiture quote "fast food has made all the american women fat and lazy and that is why all russian women are beutiful to us". I would love to live in Moscow or St. Petersburg and learn your language and meet a beutiful Russian lady and settle down to a modest existance built on love with my lady. I come from nothing and I feel comfortable in all situations. i would miss nothing from here. I have seen many russian women in this city and they hold themselves with inner confidence and they make my chin drop at their beuty and their grace. I am very good lookng and can get any lady I choose, not braggin just stating fact, the Canadian women look at me when their husbands heads are turned, the russian women don't take their eyes off of their man even if she is beutiful and he is fat and ugly. that is why i want a Russian lady.
Vicky
11-10-2002, 10:37 AM
</span>just look at Jon, he is betraying the trust of his new girlfreind because he calls his old girlfreind a freind boo hooo he is probable full of himself because he has a little money and now that he has lots of Ukranine women fawning over him, he has to keep all opportunities open because of his low self esteme.<span =''>
I read that and found that pretty strange. If a guy, according to Matt, is not allowed to have female friends if he's getting married to one woman, what's the point about women then? Jon is of low self-esteem and short of money if he's trying to keep friends with the girl he once knew. Funny, if not absurd. I have several friends among foreigners, dated them (which actually doesn't mean I had more intimate relations with them) and not going to cut the ties off just because in some time I'm going to marry one of them or another. Matt, you don't think I'm doing this because I'm of low self-esteem, do you http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif Or maybe there's something else, something evil on my mind? http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
As for turning off eyes - Matt, you were not literal were you? If you're that attractive that no Canadian girl miss you, why do you think Russians will? http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif Only if they are short-sighted http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
If jon is not hiddding his freindship then there if nothing wrong.
SO WHAT YOU ARE SAYING VICKY IS THAT YOU BELIEVE IN HIDING A FREINDSHIP I find that strange. I would never put a freindship in front of my relationship therefore I wouldn't seek a woman like you it is that simple. You sound like the women that put freinds in front or relationship and that just spell disaster for one or the other partners. This is what I look for in a woman andf it is my preference if you find what Jon is doing forthright then you should try to get in touch with him because you seem to be the type I am trying to avoid.
Of course you are doing it out of low self esteme why if a freindship were to make your mate angy would you continue to carry on that freindship? freindships are not permanent, people come and go , there are definitely other motives if you are risking a relationship for a freindship whether it be acceptance from the person that was your freind or that you in the back of your mind think that you will get back together sometime. carrying on the freindship is a line to what might happen again . I am not saying that you shouldn't keep being freinds with those you have been with I am saying that you should take care of the relationship you are in , how could you miss that. and yes I am all that and a slice of toast.and maybe the russian lady that was with her husband was sneeking peeks at me and I just didn't see or maybe she was neer sighted.
No I don't think that jon is poor, quite the opposite to say aperson has a little money means they have it in abundance or are at least not worried about it. and i was refering to the fact that he seems to mention it lots like it's important that he spent it on her and her mom. The language barrier is what you are having trouble with? or my opinions becaause they are cut and dry. or maybe my infflated self esteme that is maybe covering for something that I am missing in my life, maybe that is what you are having trouble with. Would you really jeaporadize a good relationship over a freind that hasn't been in your life for a truly long time and lets get it straight that a couple of years is not a long time. Maybe you and Jon have trouble making freinds and when youget them you do everything to keep them even hurt the ones that love you. Love is give and take and bottom line , if you are doing something that will hurt the other then why are you doing it. If Jon doesn't like the fact that he can't have an ex as a freind then why doesn't he say "thats it, she is my freind and if you don't like it, then why should we go on" I HATE sneeky people, I have no use for them. none. either stop the freindship or be open about it, don't be a snake in the grass about it. Is that the behaviour you are accustomed to Viky? I'm sorry for you if it is. :
Vicky
11-10-2002, 12:02 PM
Matt,
you sound like your "slice of toast" has been in the oven for too long http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif Who's hiding what? It's not the language barrier, I guess it's mind barrier, but I won't turn this into a flame thing, if you think I'm the girl to be avoided - let it be this way, it's your opinion and I won't do anything to prove the other way just for you. I've got many friends, both girls and guys, and if they're real friends I won't dump anyone of them just because my man might start suspecting things. If he's doing that, it's his problem, I've always been honest and won't ever keep anyone as a second chance, but friends will always be friends, they are people who share same values as me though it doesnt necessarily mean they will share my private life. It looks like you're trying to seem the know-how-to live-man. Or is it the language barrier again? http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Matt,
I think you missed the point. Why is it wrong to have female friends? Just because it didn't work our with my ex-girlfriend doesn't mean that I hate her and have to avoid contact. We are adults and realized that the relationship wasn't going to work. So what's wrong with still being friends?
As for my low self esteem, well probably that has something to do with it. Yeah that and lack of money has gotten to me lately. I dread waking up in the morning because life is so terrible and I'm always broke. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
I already said that "money can't buy love!!!!". This is so true with any woman. Why did I go on lots of holidays with women from the FSU? Did anyone consider that I might have had a good time with people who are interesting and I care about? I have some great memories and often share them with my ex-girlfriend and friends. Isn't that what life is all about?
I'm really sorry about bringing up the whole mess with holidays because most people either don't understand or are under the impression that it was to "get laid". Wow, what will people think of next.
I can't help it if what someone "assumes" that taking a friend on holiday is for evil purposes. That's not my problem. I don't have any issues and wake up every morning feeling good.
Cheers to Vicky for having the courage to maintain her friends when most people frown on male/female friendships.
Jon
</span>[QUOTE= (Jon @ Nov. 08 2002,21:43)]Hello Marioosa,
Please dig further and you will see something else, because you wrote:
"Of course, there could arise another question - why you have invited your girl to Turkey which every average girl can theoretically afford
I think that Vicky has a crush on me and she is using hostility to impress me. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
You both missed the point and I am not going to make it again
. stupidity pisses me off and I won't justify wasting my time writing another explination reread what I have written and don't bother me anymore I was writting to Maroossia.
Vicky
11-10-2002, 02:55 PM
</span>I think that Vicky has a crush on me and she is using hostility to impress me. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif<span =''>
If that flatters you, I won't object http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
Gee Matt,
You wrote:
"Maroossia I'd just like to add that alot of the men that go to Russia to get their wives can't get women here because they are fat , old, stupid , arrogant,etc. just look at Jon, he is betraying the trust of his new girlfreind because he calls his old girlfreind a freind boo hooo he is probable full of himself because he has a little money and now that he has lots of Ukranine women fawning over him, he has to keep all opportunities open because of his low self esteme."
Then you write that it all about Maroosia, but why did you include me in the topic. I never said anything about you. Did I say that you had an issue with women in your country and can't get a date? Did I say you were probably working at a fast food restruarant as a short-order cook? DId I say anything about your cash-flow problems? NO! Heck I don't even know who you are, but I can say that without a doubt that you probably think all the women want you?
So, Matt why are you looking for a woman from the FSU? Why have you dreamed of a Russian woman since you were 16 years old? DId you have problems with girls back then too?
Please don't make assumptions until you know what you're talking about. Keep dreaming a maybe someday you will find a woman in Russia? Who knows, I'm sure there are women in Moscow who are happy to be with a high-school drop out?
P.S. I never betrayed anyone's trust just because I retain my friendships. Maybe you can learn from women and become friends first, then talk about how great you are later!!!
Jon
Vicky
11-10-2002, 03:29 PM
</span>stupidity pisses me off and I won't justify wasting my time writing another explination reread what I have written and don't bother me anymore I was writting to Maroossia.<span =''>
How arrogant http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif We've got nothing to do here but bothering people who don't like talking to us. Live and let others live, Matt, I doubt anyone would burn off wishing to set up a long-lasting communication with you. I might be wrong though, but I didn't know you at all till today when I got a pretty offensive remarks at more or less innocent comments of mine. If that's your line, follow it, it's your choice, and if it makes you happy, I promise I would ever never comment on what you post here. Feel free, you avoided the evil http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif
Vicky,
I wouldn't waste my time with this guy because he is more than arrogant, he's obnoxious to the point that I can almost compare him to a poorly bred boon-dog.
He dosn't know class and couldn't begin to accept you as a FSU woman.
Jon
Maroossia
11-10-2002, 09:45 PM
OK-OK... cool down, ladies & gentlemen!
Matt was writing to ME!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
And I do feel that we understand each other very well, he's the only one who's got my point about Muscovites!
Matt, I love your words!!! (I would even say - I love YOU for what you said...!) But some people have taken you for an outrage, I had the same here at first http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
I'm going to write a special post for you!!!
But I'll start with Lou and Katya's postings.
Katya, there's one thing that I fully agree with you about - that if a girl haven't been replying for 3 days, she may be celebrating, or she's away from Internet, or she has too much housework... that's true.
BUT! (even if you were joking) Not all the girls may love football only if they love a man who loves football. I'm the rare female football fan and I love football so much just for the sake of FOOTBALL!
Maroossia
11-10-2002, 11:08 PM
Now, Jon.
It does make sense to take a lady to a neutral environment to get more exposure to each other, but on the other hand it sounds more like a scientific approach to selecting a mate... Are you looking for an ideal to judge every little habit of your girlfriend? And another thing - extre-e-mely valid point - 'she was too young for me'.
I must confess, it's my favourite!!! (though I must say - applied to Russian men only - until now!)
Well-well-well, didn't you know she was too young when you started dating her? (btw, what's the age difference?)
Russian men (particularly in Moscow) about 40 often try to date girls under 25. Do you know the actual reason for this??? These men are just afraid of ladies of the same age, because the men are too primitive to impress the ladies. They can try and impress only young girls, and after they are fed up making sex with them, they declare these girls are too young and silly and running away from problems... Jon, is there any hope for me you're not such a man??? Moreover, you dated her for 2 (two!) years... Probably you took it too serious http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
I believe that such things as immaturity or - on the opposite - readiness for commitment can be easily seen at the very beginning. It's just intuition or a little bit of psychological knowledge...
Now I can see that it's not really the matter of respect (?)...
Perhaps you just didn't know what you wanted for the moment...
And again - male/female friendship - I would emphasize that I believe in '3 in 1' for a married couple, i.e. each of them is 'husband/wife-BEST FRIEND-lover' for the other one, which means that I would reduce my personal contacts for my BEST FRIEND (husband) AND expect the same from him.
And the last one, Galina's impression of Moscow girls... It may sound funny but I'm used to think exactly the same but of the small town girls who come to conquer the big city and are ready for anything just to get their place in Moscow or to help their starving families in the small towns. Right, you may say, at least they have a motivation for selling their love/body. But I would raise an objection to the Moscow girls casual sex statement. Well, perhaps some wouldn't mind taking presents from rich men or going out with them, but that does not necessarily mean they would have sex with them
Maroossia
11-11-2002, 12:02 AM
MATT!!!
At last.... I'm all yours! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Thanks for the 'beautiful name'. In fact, it's quite ordinary...
So you say you wanted a Moscow or SPB girl since you were 16... And you know how to treat a Moscow girl properly - not to be cheap when you're looking for love... That's right... But you also say there're more scams coming from big cities like Moscow as posted on some web-sites. I didn't quite understand - do you personally believe it? And what has your experience been with Moscow or SPB girls so far? Will you share it with me? I hope you don't offer each girl in the very first letter to pay for her translations... It's very easy to get scammed this way (especially if the girl writes good English herself).
Another thing that's not very clear for me - have you been to Moscow or/and SPB? It's great that you're interested in the cultural issues and Russian language. You're welcome to settle down here, and I'm sure it won't be difficult for you to find a well-paid job - according to North American standards (and extremely well-paid - to Russian standards). I'm glad you seem not to be too cautious about the terrorist issue - you just want to find a soulmate and obviously you very well realize that you can't be absolutely safe anywhere in this world these days, and if there's something to happen to you, it will happen even at some heavenly place on Earth (like Bali)...
As I've already said, Matt, you've got the best understanding of what I was trying to say, and besides, you put a valid point that I fully agree with, namely the friendship issue and being open about it.
As for your arrogance and looks...
Vicky
11-11-2002, 02:27 AM
</span>[QUOTE= (Jon @ Nov. 10 2002,23:47)]Vicky,
I wouldn't waste my time with this guy because he is more than arrogant, he's obnoxious to the point that I can almost compare him to a poorly bred boon-dog.
YES, I knew you would read and understand Maroossia, there is nothing ordinary about you. I could tell by reading what you would write and I was always baffled by the responses you were getting . I joined this site because of it. I was mad at the first posting that jon wrote to your question and from then on he became fair game. He absolutely didn't get what you were saying, he was even a touch abusive towards you so i felt no need to hold back. Vicky is just so crazy about me, if I was standing next to her she would be hitting me in the arm , you know like little kids and how they show their feelings. I think it's cute. I love her comment about the toast in the oven,I giggled so hard tears rolled down my face.
I have very little experience with Moscow women and it is because I have only been seeking one for a short time now, I have always thought about it but now i am acting on my thoughts. I really read a site that is devoted to matching people from here to people from there and it did say that women from Moscow are to be watched closely and all women from major urban areas were to be watched because of profesional scammers. I have been honestly ,until now avoiding women from these areas. There are so many beutiful ladies from Moscow and S.PB . I will click on the women i find the most attractive to my tasts and most times I find they are from Moscow, I have been ignoring them, I have looked, said sh*t they are from Moscow and I have gone on. I feel bad now.
I never offer to pay right away, i know that there are scammers out there and I, like everyone else, do not want to be taken advantage of. their is only one lady that I am writing to and I didn't know about the translation fees but she mentioned it to me and I was shocked, why would a lady so pretty and nice pay to write to me. I sent the money right away. I also watch who i write to because of that now, I don't want to cost someone money. The lady that I was writting to after time it was obvious that we wern't to be.
I have never been anywhere and maybe there is a part of me that is jeleous of jon because he has travelled there already but I will someday. I have travelled across Canada and have lived at both coasts. I love this country but i am getting sick of it here. I have only been to the states once, I should have been there lots more because most of my family is from there. My grandfather and all his 4 brothers were named after presidents of the United States (little tidbit of info, I think it's kinda cool). I would feel less at ease there than I would in Moscow, everyone in the states is armed to the teeth, even little kids carry guns, I think in Texas it's against the law to leave your home without a conceled weapon. I think that when a Canadian crosses the border into the States that we should be given guns just to balance things out a little, I mean not many of us even know how to use them so it would be just for show.(thats just a little joke)(I'm just letting the humour impared know this before I get to much hate mail).
Maroossia, I really do love that name, I've never heard it before. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif You are right about everything in what you have written and it really bothers me that others do not see this as well , it's also as if they are drilling you for what you say and I don't like it. As for calming down, you did an amazing job of it with your soothing words to everyone http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif It's your personality that I am looking for, not only in russia but all the world,you are very rare and a treasure. So you want to see how good looking i am eh? well I'll let everyone doubt me for now but i promise that I will eventually post one, but just for you. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
Jon how can you say such harsh things to me ? I have feelings you know and all my work mates at Burger King want an apollagy as well. My feeling of self worth has been diminished by your comments. You have hurt my burger flipping feelings, you want fries with that. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif I also resent the fact that my dropping out of high school is any buissiness of yours and I'm sure that some very educated Moscow woman would take pity on my stupid self and love me anyway. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif cause I'm a nice guy and my mom says I'm good looking. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
Vicky ,you are so right in what you have just said. I would also like to tell you that I'm flattered with all the attention you have been showing me, I must be a little intimidated by you and now that i know you are from S.PB I can understand. Have you ever seen the movie "Enemy at the Gates" ? In Germany the film is called the duell, i think. Oh yes and Vicky one night with me and you would give up women. I would post a picture of myself but jon would probably give up women also. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
angelin
11-11-2002, 05:10 AM
</span><span =''>
Handsome Matt , very interesting to see your pict.
I have a lot picts from foreign men , and ( so sorry ) I cannot tell ever one , that he is good-looker. Interesting to see this wonders of nature.
And , as woman , I can tell you , that one night can be enough for man , but never
Hi Maroossia,
</span>What really makes me worry - marriage is not something that must happen at all cost for you... Don't you think about the time when you get old, and you need your children's help and care?..... I have no family anymore and for me it's the matter of utter importance to build a family of my own. Hence would come a conclusion - it's also a motivation that matters!... You're right - there must be love and true friendship. I wouldn't marry anyone just because I want to be married. But I will never get that pessimistic as to thinking that I would give up and be alone if I didn't find my ideal special one... Don't you know that thought is material?<span =''>
Hmm, I never said that I would "give up and be alone"! I said that "I would look elsewhere". I was also trying to say that I would rather be by myself then to marry someone for the wrong reasons. Also I never said "ideal special one" either, that would entail that I have this pre conceived idea of who she is and what she is like but that would only be setting myself up for failure. There are certain characteristics that attract me and others that don't, all to different degrees. I try to look at the whole person, and see if I can love this person not because of the things that I like about her (that is too easy) but for those that I do not.
I guess that you have found a fundamental difference between us. Marriage is not something that must happen at all cost. Yes the thought of being alone in my old age frightens me a little (but that is what friends and family are for). I am sorry to hear that you have lost your family already. But would I marry someone and have kids just so that I won't be alone or will have someone to take care of me? Let's just agree to disagree on this one http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>And you seem to be having very little experience with Moscow girls to be classified as not matching their requirements for some reasons (I think my second post it was...!) As Matt said, Moscow girls are harder to impress...<span =''>
OK, I had a hard time with this one, trying to figure out if you were just suggesting that I need to meet more Muscovites or what. I will make the assumption that it was the former since you have been courteous with me since the beginning.
</span>Don't you know that thought is material?<span =''>
I do not understand this one either, could you explain?
Lou
Matt,
"myself but jon would probably give up women also. "
Couldn't do that, but hey who knows?
Cheers,
Jon
http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif Angelin, Oh you would be mine all right, thats a given , and all your pretty girlfreinds would be wondering why you don't call on them anymore, you would tell them "no waaay ladies, I've got Matt" then you would brag and brag about me. How do I know I'm so good looking ? My Mom told me and I hope you ain't calling my mom a lire..lyier..lier....... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif fibber. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif sorry the day they taught us how to spell in school I missed and went fishing.
Maroosia,
You wrote:
"Well-well-well, didn't you know she was too young when you started dating her? (btw, what's the age difference?)
Russian men (particularly in Moscow) about 40 often try to date girls under 25. Do you know the actual reason for this??? These men are just afraid of ladies of the same age, because the men are too primitive to impress the ladies. They can try and impress only young girls, and after they are fed up making sex with them, they declare these girls are too young and silly and running away from problems... Jon, is there any hope for me you're not such a man??? Moreover, you dated her for 2 (two!) years... Probably you took it too serious "
How should I answer this question? First let me start by saying that I should have known that the age difference was going to become an issue. Our history wasn't about age at first. How we met was something that I wasn't really expecting at the time. I wasn't looking for a FSU woman when I received an e-mail from Galina. I made the mistake once of going to a couple of dating sites and somehow got on one agencies mailing list. I would get a couple of letters each week, but wouldn't respond because I wasn't interested in dating FSU women at the time. I was already dating someone and had other interests besides getting into another relationship so soon after my divorce.
When Galina wrote me I was intrigued by her letter and wanted to know more. Little did I know at the time that she didn't write the letter (marriage agency scam). I must confess that I was also smitten by her looks. She didn't look like a girl of 21, but closer to 28 or 30. I'd never tell her this in person, I hope you understand why. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/wow.gif
We were both somewhat lonely at the time and our relationship just grew from a few letters to talking on the telephone. We both became aware that the agency was sending letters she had no knowledge of and we had to do something to get away from the agency. Long story, but it was an adventure. The marriage agency is one of the "best known" scam agencies in Chernovsty. We found out the hard way, but managed to break-away from the agency and strike out on our own. So at this point we both have a common enemy and goal.
Maybe part of me wanted to protect her? Maybe part of me wanted the adventure of a younger woman in a foreign country? I can't say for sure, but I can say that it wasn't too difficult to fall in love. Maybe it took our meeting in Spain or the Dominican Republic for me to feel the full effects of our relationship? I can't say for sure. We were taking our time to explore our feelings. After a year it was clear that we both cared deeply for each other, but I was starting to wonder if she was really prepared for life outside the FSU.
I want to explain one thing. I am on an adventure for the next five or six years and need a woman who is mature enough to handle the difficult situations we may encounter. I can't be with someone who is too young and naive to know when to listen and when to talk. I'll try to explain this better later. But when I am in another country and have the responsibility for our safety, I want to be with someone who will listen when I say it's time to go. Sometimes there are reasons for my actions and don't need to have 1000 questions thrown at me.
What adventure you ask? Well I'm an American writer working on several books in Europe. I came to Holland to finish three books and then I'm off to another part of the world. Maybe Germany or Spain? I don't know yet. After I complete the third book then I will decide where to move next. I have a very tight schedule and really don't have time to wait for a girl to become a woman. I perfer a woman closer to my age who has had some "life experiences" and has been with men before. I don't want to become the teacher because I am a student of life myself.
Enough said. Am I like the Russian men who seek younger women and then grow tired of them? NO! I really don't have the time to be chasing young girls all over Europe or the FSU. Its not my cup-of-tea. I'd rather spend my time and energy on writing.
Hope this helps.
Jon
angelin
11-11-2002, 02:07 PM
</span>[QUOTE= (Matt @ Nov. 11 2002,09:26)]http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif Angelin, Oh you would be mine all right, thats a given , and all your pretty girlfreinds would be wondering why you don't call on them anymore, you would tell them "no waaay ladies, I've got Matt" then you would brag and brag about me. How do I know I'm so good looking ? My Mom told me and I hope you ain't calling my mom a lire..lyier..lier....... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif fibber. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
katya
11-11-2002, 04:42 PM
</span><span =''>
The people divide righteous men, who consider themselves sinners, and sinners, which consider themselves righteous men.
Pascal
G'day Matt,
I,m feeling a little neglected, my mum used to call me "her special little soldier", she never mentioned anything about being "good-looking", your a lucky bastard mate!!!!!
Cheers Liam.
Howdy Liam
My Mom always told me to stop polishing my special soldier http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Oh Katya
I think you found me out, I'm balding, fat, pimply faced, low self esteme and I'm a terrible, terrible person http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif
Maroossia
11-11-2002, 09:27 PM
Matt,
</span>baffled by the responses you were getting . I joined this site because of it. .......<span =''>
And did the very right thing - to promote some certain point of view that we share... Thanks again, your post has warmed up my heart, as ever http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>[QUOTE= ]if I was standing next to her she would be hitting me in the arm , you know like little kids and how they show their feelings. I think it's cute.
Maroossia
11-11-2002, 09:42 PM
Lou,
I'm afraid we shall hardly ever understand each other - it's like we live in different dimensions... I'm so sorry about that... Every time I post something - it turns out that I mean one thing and you understand it just the other way round... Maybe it's language barrier, or as someone said, mind barrier...
</span>OK, I had a hard time with this one, trying to figure out if you were just suggesting that I need to meet more Muscovites or what. I will make the assumption that it was the former since you have been courteous with me since the beginning. ............... I do not understand this one either, could you explain? <span =''>
Nevermind... It would take too long to explain, and I seriously doubt that I would do it properly.... And it's not that important to waste time on it (both yours and mine) http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Just imagine that I was delirious (or drunk) writing all that stuff
My dear Maroosia
You are just a sweetie, Your old boyfreind is really old. I thought that 10 years in the difference was really streatching it. Did he move to Moscow and hasn't left since he dissapered or is he there again?
Maroossia
11-11-2002, 10:22 PM
Hi Jon!
</span>I wasn't looking for a FSU woman when I received an e-mail from Galina.... <span =''>
Now I see! I understand what you're talking about... Yep, this happens, and I'm glad you're not the kind of man mentioned by me. Your relationship was developing in such a way that it was really irrelevant thinking about the age issue until it became too obvious...
But now that I've found out that you stay in Holland, I can't help asking another troublesome question: why wouldn't you invite Galine to Holland??? ..... just to see her acting in the possible future life environment...
Another thing is that my previous guess was right - (one more guess) you didn't know what you really wanted, and I'm not sure you do now...
But why is it so? Sure, you're a (what I call) creative person - a writer! Don't take offense, but I try to avoid such men - writers, musucians, artists, actors... You never know what their creative mind would tell them to do next moment, you always have to adjust and to feel inferior to the (most often) unacknowledged talent. For me true writers, musicians, etc. are those world- or at least nation-wide famous ones - the rest are just loosers... Sorry, don't really mean to hurt anyone, but this one (issue) is among my favourites as well... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
I prefer more mundane men who really know what they want and can do crazy things sometimes for the woman they love... Just turn their mind off for some time and listen to their heart... I have to confess that I myself still have to learn how to do this - my mind is dominating over whatever else almost all the time http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif... But in other people I prefer the heart guidance... it's what I lack! Indeed, opposites attract!
But, Jon, d' you feel now your current girlfriend is the one you really need? ..............
Thanks for another opportunity to speak my poor mind out... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Regards,
Maroossia
Maroossia
11-11-2002, 10:24 PM
Hi Matt!
You appear to be online now!
He hasn't left, I think http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif But I don't really care for him anymore...
Yeh Maroossia I was online and saw that you were to so I started to write but I had to leave just as quick because my 2 year old baby girl needed me and she comes first over everything in the world. My girl was watching Scooby doo, and when she is watching Scooby doo, she wont pay attention to anything else, she shuts off the outside world, so I finished cleaning up her lunch mess and i got online to see if you were as well and I was pleasently suprised to see that you were, but I had to go without really chatting with you I know you understand. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
I wonder if the Canadian guy got stuck in Russia because of all the pretty ladies or because he found that it is the lifestyle that he prefers? I think that I might get stuck in Russia if I went but i would always have to come back to see my baby.
You write very good english, where did you learn?
My grandfather is named James Garfield. His father my great grandpapy lived and worked in boston where he met a lady from Denmark that he married, he then moved to Nova Scotia back to the land that was his fathers and where he spent his child hood. My family line goes back to the first Scottish settlement ship the Hector that settled the province of Nova Scotia. just north of these settlements are where the French settled. Baack in the day, the Scottish and French were very strong alies but today it is sad to say that the french and english don't get along and the french Canadians want to separate, well 49% of them do. Another referendum has been called for in 2000 days time. I hope they don't go because I travelled to Quebec a few times skiing and I loved it there, hard to think of Canada without it.
</span>Matt,
</span>[QUOTE= ]baffled by the responses you were getting . I joined this site because of it. .......<span =''>
And did the very right thing - to promote some certain point of view that we share... Thanks again, your post has warmed up my heart, as ever http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>[QUOTE= ]if I was standing next to her she would be hitting me in the arm , you know like little kids and how they show their feelings. I think it's cute.
Hello Maroossia,
To answer your questions about Galina and writers. Well I did invite her but she couldn't make the trip because of some little problem with her passport.
About writers. I'm sure creative people often stand outside of the norm and do stuff that most people wouldn't think about doing. Maybe artist and inventors are a little wacky at times. That's all part of their charm also. I used to spend a lot of time working on inventions until it became that I couldn't spend quality time with my family. I would spend way too much time working with people from JPL or Bell Labs or Los Alamos or NBST (ie. DOE) to really take the time to spend with the kids or wife. Gave up working on all the inventions over ten years ago. Funny though how I often think about what would have happened if I continued to pursue some of them? I probably spent more time with rocket scientists than with my wife at the time.
Anyway. I do think my current girlfriend is best for me because she has such a calming effect on my personality. I can actually get some work done for a change. She's spunky and won't take any crap from me also. I like women with strong personalities who stick up for themselves and don't let men push them around. More women should do this and tell me to stick it where the sun don't shine sometimes.
P.S. You can go to www.uspto.gov and look at my patent #4831267. It's one of my earlier works on advanced neuclear lasers.
Bye,
Jon
</span>Thanks, Lou.
Good point!
But then let's put it this way - perhaps it's also the man's cultural and intellectual background that matters.
I've read a posting here where a man shared his love story with a Thai girl - they were unable to communicate properly because of her extremely poor English, but his vivid description of her exceptional appearance, skin of silk, long beautiful hair, the way she moved, etc., made me think that he didn't actually need a SOULmate, just a piece of meat (though a beautiful one) who would not talk much (or at all), be submissive, tender, affectionate, just someone to have sex with and to be proud of when you walk along the street (however, this would become boring soon?). For this very man it's enough... Would this fact speak of him as of a narrow-minded one?
I don't know - maybe this can be called snobism, but there are men (quite a lot of them) who would prefer a good communicator, a lady with whom they can discuss and share most of their interests, a true friend - for such men the lack of intellect or language command will soon become a serious obstacle for developing a deeper relationship.
I'm not trying to say that girls from Russian regions are less educated, less sensitive, less cultured, or whatever - I know lots of cases about the so called "diamonds in the raw", I believe you understand what I'm talking about. It's just a generalized opinion that girls living in big cities can be concidered more advanced in all senses.
Oh, by the way, here I've also read a few times something like "even men from Moscow know that the best girls live elsewhere but Moscow". Believe me, it's not true. Men from Moscow usually avoid girls from elsewhere - there are many reasons for this, beginning with the notorious Moscow registration, fear of gold-diggers, etc. Again, only those men from Moscow would seek a girl outside Moscow, who want a very modest, unpretentious girl (well, you may say "unspoiled" - but that's another discussion), but such girls can be found in Moscow as well...
Here comes your point, Lou, - if a man stated for himself that his special lady lives - next door, in some other city, overseas, or maybe just in his dreams - then he will go exactly where he expects to find her, and look there, and choose from what he has there.
It's like many girls in the FSU - they just choose a country ("I want to go to America, or Switzerland" - which is very popular now - in Moscow, "or Australia....") and she looks in this very country...
A long posting it is! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Please mind that my personal opinion is not necessarily the same as the above, I'm just trying to push it up and keep the discussion going http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Any other comments?<span =''>
Hey Melcontent , or what ever your fucking name is. I did not "boink" the girl. Get you fucking English straight, #######!! I said, "we held each other all night". No bodily fluids were exchanged you numbnut!!! What part of, "we held each other all night" do you have a problem with.There was no sex involved just a relationship that transcended normal comunication bounderies. You are probably jealous because you never experienced a love like that. I assure you, Phett IS NOT A PIECE OF MEAT!!!! She is here with my now and thinks that you are the biggest ####### that walked the face of the planet. Keep you fucking comments to yourself. Juneau from Bangkok has spoken!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/mad.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/mad.gif
Watch the mouth again! Besides the person you are talking about is a woman. Perhaps a little more reading and a little less talking. One tends to learn more when one listens!!! Have a nice day Juneau. By the way, I did like your romantic story!! I think that everyone on this border would love to be able to find a soulmate where they use telepathy to communicate. My mate in Vancouver has a relationship like that and it is very special. Cheers Byoof http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>[QUOTE= (Matt @ Nov. 12 2002,09:54)]byoof
Hey bone head you ain't nothing like the big man Abe, and read first as well. Your a little quick on the responses, I was editing and came out to see your comments, I told you about selfrighteousness didn't I? don't compare yourself to Abe. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif Oh yeah Bone head quite quoting everything, you are just cluttering up the site, just quote the relavent topic.
By the way Matt, I was not talking about Katya. You have much angst, I really feel for you. If you would read a little closer you would realize, my friend, that I am writing from Canada. How would I know Katya, when she is Russia? You slamming my English, well I do apologize for my typing, but not my English. You see Matt, I am an English teacher. I know English pretty well I think. A typist, I am not!!!! It must be quite hard to follow my trains of thought. Pardon me!!! I am not 10 but 39, not that I have to justify myself to anyone. I have been around the world and have seen different things. Maybe Katya is too mature for me? But I would expect you to read a sentence first, before emotion catch the better of you. I don't know this woman, I would like to know her as a friend. All I know is that when I needed help, Katya was there to help out. I am eternally greatful to her for that and I told her so!!! As for me bragging, well, you can think what you want. I was not talking to you!!! I was talking to Katya, and it was about a woman from Lugansk who was interested in me and I in her. If you must know, she wanted some money from me to continue our dialogue and Katya had talked me out of it!!!! The girls still writes me, ok?!!! She wants to keep in contact with me. That is why I saud to Katya, " I think that I may have dropped the ball on tis one". Because it is obvious she still cares for me. That was what I was talking about. As for Vicky, I don't know her either!!!! I know my typing is God aweful, but my English is sound. I don't want to censor you either!!!That would defeat the purpose of this website now, would it not?!!!! Have a nice day Matt http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>[QUOTE= (Matt @ Nov. 12 2002,10:30)]Hey bone head you ain't nothing like the big man Abe, and read first as well. Your a little quick on the responses, I was editing and came out to see your comments, I told you about selfrighteousness didn't I? don't compare yourself to Abe. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif Oh yeah Bone head quite quoting everything, you are just cluttering up the site, just quote the relavent topic.
Hey Juneau
Feel tough now, punk? Are you standing taller as a man now? Whats with the hatefull abuse to a woman ? I see that you are the one in the quote but I also see that you can't read english either or you just don't understand it. Mirroosa said that it just made her think that you need a piece of meat.
Sorry bone head I just don't play well with other men, and if you are an english teacher well no wonder the country is going to h#ll in a hand basket, and if you ever feel for me I'll hit you. Stop giving me so much to work with here, your really too easy a target, I'll stop now and leave you alone but don't feel the need to comment on my writings anymore. You really shouldn't have told me you were a teacher, I just lost any tiny bit of respect that i might ever have had for you right there. The education system in this country is the worst in the western world and it's because of teachers like you. Learn how to type for Gods sake ,your a teacher. And read that statement you made that made me write to you in such a harsh manner, does that sound polite to you?
Oh i'm such a bastard tonight, sorry Mirroosa sometimes I can't help myself, It's their fault, really it is.
</span>Sorry bone head I just don't play well with other men, and if you are an english teacher well no wonder the country is going to h#ll in a hand basket, and if you ever feel for me I'll hit you. Stop giving me so much to work with here, your really too easy a target, I'll stop now and leave you alone but don't feel the need to comment on my writings anymore. You really shouldn't have told me you were a teacher, I just lost any tiny bit of respect that i might ever have had for you right there. The education system in this country is the worst in the western world and it's because of teachers like you. Learn how to type for Gods sake ,your a teacher. And read that statement you made that made me write to you in such a harsh manner, does that sound polite to you?
Oh i'm such a bastard tonight, sorry Mirroosa sometimes I can't help myself, It's their fault, really it is.<span =''>
Hey, is there a Clinical Psychologist in the house!!! God, you need therapy, Matt!!! You should look at your own English. God, your English is pathetic i.e., sentence run-ons, comma splices, etc!! I cannot believe that a person can talk the way you did to Juneau. You just lost so much respect for yourself, buddy!!! But it is your loss. It is down on paper, who you really are!!!! You should be ashamed of yourself!!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif
Vicky
11-12-2002, 10:26 AM
People will soon run in dozens to this forum just to read the high words we're posting here http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
Sometimes it comes into my mind though that it was intended for something else rather than wrangle. How nice it could be if we all bit tips of our tongues or rather hit tips of our fingers when words of offence are breaking from us, come on ladies and gentlemen, we don't know each other well enough to get to know the reaction, please don't play with feelings and provoke. Even though this makes the forum vivid, the cost is weird, not everyone can pay it.
Well, I promised to stay away from this discussion, just couldn't help asking to cool down.
Sorry Vicky
I am a biker,I don't ride a harely because I have to much money but because it is who I am. My writing may run on and my punctuation my be off but at leaast for a grade nine dropout I think it's not to bad. I work in construction surrounded by men and I have no patience with them, I have to be top dog. Towards women I feel playful and alive. For my daughter I would give my life. For the right woman I would give everything I could. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
katya
11-12-2002, 02:50 PM
</span>[QUOTE= (Matt @ Nov. 11 2002,23:51)]
G'day Matt,
You mention 'theres a thin line between love and hate', well how about stopping toying, teasing and tantalising the many young lovely ladies of this forum, cos' its obvious to me that the real object of your affections is byoof!!!!!!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Cheers
Liam
Vicky
11-12-2002, 08:16 PM
</span>[QUOTE= (liam @ Nov. 12 2002,22:54)]G'day Matt,
You mention 'theres a thin line between love and hate', well how about stopping toying, teasing and tantalising the many young lovely ladies of this forum, cos' its obvious to me that the real object of your affections is byoof!!!!!!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
</span>[QUOTE= (Vicky @ Nov. 12 2002,23:16)]</span>[QUOTE= (liam @ Nov. 12 2002,22:54)]G'day Matt,
You mention 'theres a thin line between love and hate', well how about stopping toying, teasing and tantalising the many young lovely ladies of this forum, cos' its obvious to me that the real object of your affections is byoof!!!!!!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
katya
11-12-2002, 09:26 PM
All against one
Maroossia
11-12-2002, 09:48 PM
Hi everybody!
I've been long thinking before placing another post here (the subject for thinking was - to write or not to write at all...)
I just can't understand why such posts as the one by that Bangkok lover are let into the intelligent people's discussion. Someone said here something like every opinion has the right to be spoken - I would disagree. I joined here to post comments (ok, maybe somewhat provocative at times but not lewd) and to get replies (not obscenities) in return. I myself know quite a lot of abusive words in English, much more in Russian. My only advantage is that I understand the English words, but he wouldn't understand if I call him the foulest word in my language with a most charming smile on my face. My weapon is my knowledge, and he doesn't even have the weapon of brains at his disposal (to read my initial posting properly)... I only wonder how his Thai fairy can be furious at what I said if she hardly speaks English... and what he was doing in the FSU dating forum if he had already met his love in the third world country... END (indignation expressed).
In this connection, I've got another point to post. The forum is founded by Russian people (I presume) for Russian ladies (or FSU ladies) AND foreign men who are eager to meet Russian ladies. I do realize that most of the Russian ladies want to move from their homeland for their special men (and, well, better life...), so they should speak English (or whatever) to fit into the foreign language speaking milieu. Although I personally wouldn't mind if my special man from overseas comes to Moscow for me, gets a job and lives with me here happily ever after, still they/we do not expect Western men to relocate for us and fit into our environment. I've met very few foreign men who would speak Russian - OK, many do wish to learn it... some day... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
So the point itself. Why not make a Russian-speaking forum? (it's not a suggestion, just a remark)... Because rare foreign male would come there... Most of them want an FSU woman but do not care to learn the language at least out of respect, and some even start violently abusing the ladies at the slightest sign of independent opinion on their side.
Well, I' m not sure if I actually make it to express what I feel, but I've tried to... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif Another valuable remark is that foreign men should appreciate our ability to speak their language and show due respect towards us at least for this, even if there's nothing more to respect us for...
MAROOSSIA
Maroossia
11-12-2002, 10:03 PM
Jon, it may seem strange but I don't put scientists and inventors in the same group with writers, etc. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif I have a profound respect for scientists even if I sometimes can't understand a single word of what they say. I know for sure that their brains work in the right direction (it's thanks to the scientists and inventors we've got all the cool devices that make our life so easy), and there's even a certain charm about their "beautiful minds"...
I've looked up the link you gave me, but I couldn't find the section for search by that sort of patent number... Perhaps you would help me look for the information in a proper way...
Anyway, good luck to you with your girl. I'm glad you think she's the one at last...
Regards,
Maroossia
Vicky
11-12-2002, 10:47 PM
Katya,
it's not the matter of everyone versus one, if you look carefully you'll see that "one" has a defender here. But none else is actually accusing or blaming, just a funny remark of liam http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif Actually last thing we all want here is to offend people coming to forum. Opinions that may cause some harsh words in response are the first reaction I was talking about in the previous post. I don't say that we should ignore them, but we should be careful in the first place so not to provoke those harsh comments. Maroosia, Juneau has the right for the first reaction to your comment, I'd have the same in fact if I was him, just that I wouldn't put it in the same words being a female. I'm not defending him, for sure he should have shown more respect to a girl even if he doesn't like the way she thinks.
And finally to Matt - forget please about construction when you are here, we are not bricks that need to be hit or dropped down first so that we stick together firmly http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Maroossia
11-12-2002, 11:06 PM
Hi Matt,
I can see you've had hard times beating off the weirdos, defending yourself and finally apologizing to those deeply hurt by your postings...
</span>[QUOTE= (liam @ Nov. 12 2002,22:54)]G'day Matt,
You mention 'theres a thin line between love and hate', well how about stopping toying, teasing and tantalising the many young lovely ladies of this forum, cos' its obvious to me that the real object of your affections is byoof!!!!!!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
</span>[QUOTE= (Maroossia @ Nov. 13 2002,02:06)]Hi Matt,
I can see you've had hard times beating off the weirdos, defending yourself and finally apologizing to those deeply hurt by your postings...
Maroossia
11-13-2002, 12:01 AM
</span>[QUOTE= ]As for you Melcontent. Fuck off you bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/mad.gif
Vicky
11-13-2002, 12:13 AM
Byoff has disappointed me a lot... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif
*shivering at one thought of being "awarded" with something similar*
byoof,
"its better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt" (twain)
No No No Liam it's not Byoof that I'm after, it's you, my special soldier. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif The FSU ladies are my front to win you ya cheeky devil.
Yes Vicky again you are right , I will not treat the men that offend me as bricks. i will also watch my play words with the ladies because I do'nt want to leave this site and I really don't want to offend the ladies. I will ignore all comments in my direction by others that feel It is their right to comment on me.(run on sentence sorry i'm uneducated)
Marroosa i could never be dissapointed by you or your looks, your personality and perseptions are right on and as everyone knows ,looks are in the eyes of the beholder.
If you moved to Canada where were you going to live? did you have a city picked out? I am sorry to hear of your mothers passing, It's something that a person really can't get over. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif
My ex ,hmmm, well she is an excellent freind, one of the best I have, as for a mate, well she is better as a freind. She is very beutiful and the men would run at her wenever we went out. She always had a group of men around her trying to get her attention. It bothered me a bit but not enough to get mad and I feel secure with myself . If she wanted to run around then it was her buisiness. Then she did runoround and I forgave her but then she kept doing it so i felt that there was no reason to stay together because I honestly didn't cheat on her and I had no desiere to cheat on her. She would like to get back together but a massive amounts of damage was done to my trust for her and it can't be repaired. I live close to her now to make it easier to see my little girl. My little girl is hilarios, she makes me laugh with the things she does. I value every second with her. I get lonely thou and I would like to find my true soul mate. Maybe she is in the FSU and maybe it's that cheeky devil Liam. I don't know but I'm looking and hopefully i'll find her.
G'day,
Can anyone tell me what "SPB girls" are?http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif, maroossia mentioned them in a previous post.
Thanks,
Liam
</span>Jon, it may seem strange but I don't put scientists and inventors in the same group with writers, etc. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif I have a profound respect for scientists even if I sometimes can't understand a single word of what they say. I know for sure that their brains work in the right direction (it's thanks to the scientists and inventors we've got all the cool devices that make our life so easy), and there's even a certain charm about their "beautiful minds"...
I've looked up the link you gave me, but I couldn't find the section for search by that sort of patent number... Perhaps you would help me look for the information in a proper way...
Anyway, good luck to you with your girl. I'm glad you think she's the one at last...
Regards,
Maroossia<span =''>
Hello Maroossia,
Here is the long paste for the Patent:
http://patimg1.uspto.gov/.piw?do....rl=http (http://patimg1.uspto.gov/.piw?docid=US004831627&SectionNum=3&IDKey=09AAC8EC9BEB&HomeUrl=http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?Sect1=PTO2%2526Sect2=HITOFF%2526u=/netahtml/search-adv.htm%2526r=103%2526f=G%2526l=50%2526d=FT90%2526 s1=laser%2526s2=campbell%2526co1=AND%2526p=3%2526O S=laser%252BAND%252Bcampbell%2526RS=laser%252BAND% 252Bcampbell)
Maybe I didn't give you the correct patent number? It is 4831627. Besides I haven't worked on this laser for ten years. I submitted it to JPL and a few other labs after my intitial review by the DOE. Don't have time to construct the prototype ( http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif ). I would rather just let it float in the public domain. I wasted way too many brain cells trying to resolve some minor technical issues. Mass/energy ~ not dating = ^ out of phase.
Jon
Hello Maroossia,
You wrote: "Anyway, good luck to you with your girl. I'm glad you think she's the one at last..."
We really don't know such things in life. Maybe she is the right one for me? I don't know yet. Thats the wonderful about dating. We will meet again soon in Kiev and find out how we get along. Maybe something will happen and we will discover that its not right?
I can tell you something that did bother me last night. When I called she was tired from studying and grumpy. Most times she is in good spirits and cheerful, but when she is hungry or tired she becomes a different woman. Is this normal? I don't understand this behavior and told her that it bothers me when she gets upset or raises her voice. I'm not a Russian man, so I don't expect to be treated like one. I find it interesting that some FSU women can become upset very easily and raise their voice in a conversation. This is a big turn-off for me and I don't like it. So what am I to do? I would never marry a woman who can't control her emotions.
I could use your advice here...
Jon
Maroossia
11-13-2002, 08:37 PM
Hi Jon,
Thanks for giving me the link, I'll try to look it up later as now I'm having some trouble with Internet connection.
Now about your girl. It's really a very interesting observation about the FSU girls becoming easily upset and raising their voice http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif But I think it all depends on the girl and the situation she's in, not her nationality. Perhaps she gets tired at times - you said it's due to her studies, but when the studies are over, who knows, maybe she'll never get as much upset. When a human being is hungry (no matter male or female), I think it's normal to stay grumpy until he/she eats something. It's like 'the beauty in the eye of the beholder' - here a turn-off is in the eye of the beholder. Everyone sets priorities for oneself - an absolute turn-off, a minor turn-off, etc. Or just tries to justify one's lover - perhaps he's just tired, it's not a permanent turn-off... But in any way, if you really love someone, you're always ready to sacrifice something for your beloved, and your special one just reciprocates with the same sacrifice, and everyone is happy. That's called love, or harmony, or whatever... Some people often see other's bad manner of eating as a serious turn-off (and this one can hardly be cured indeed http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif ) But in your case I wouldn't be too much bothered... You have to remember that the girl lives in an unstable country, she may be having lots of problems and her life is really hard... But when you take her to your sweet home, she'll become an angel just for you and will never ever raise her voice again...
Not sure if my words make any sense to you, but that's what I think about it.
Could you kindly tell me if there is anything else that ever turns you off? I'm just curious (as a female) http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Sincerely,
Maroossia
Hello Maroosia,
You wrote: "Could you kindly tell me if there is anything else that ever turns you off? I'm just curious (as a female) "
I don't expect women (my girl) to become a perfect angel so its understandable if she is upset and grumpy at times. I know that she is really a good person, but when she gets "hungry" or "tired" she becomes a different woman. Its weird to see the transformation.
What do I consider a turn-off? That's really difficult. I think that if you picked you nose in public? Maybe getting mad for no good reason and taking it out on me? Most of the turn-offs are probably something she did that offended me. I don't think people are perfect, so I give a lot of slack for certain things they do.
I live a really calm and relaxed life. So my biggest problem with FSU women (whom I've met so far) is that they tend to be a little "up-tight". They seem to easily become upset at little problems and blow them out of porportion. Maybe some of the women on this list are different, but I probably will never know?
I won't date anyone from this site because I've given too much personal information about myself. I would rather meet someone who learns about me in a different light, so to speak.
Hopes this helps. I did understand everything you said and am glad to meet women like yourself. I could always use advice and know a good source... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/wow.gif
If I can help you understand American men please let me know.
Jon
Maroossia
11-13-2002, 09:13 PM
MATT,
Thanks for sharing your story. So your baby girl lives with her mother, not with you, right? I'm sure you'll find your perfect mate - you've got a heart of gold above all!!!
I always get frustrated to hear about women being unfaithful... It's not that FSU women are extremely loyal - I speak only for myself now... In my environment I used to meet men who would run around, not women... Perhaps that's just the matter of men/women shortage respectively in Russia/Western countries... again, I don't know... For me the least thing that I can do for my special man, is being loyal to him. It goes without saying. But never in my life have I met a man who would be completely loyal to me... Again, maybe it's my fault... Actually I don't like to go too deep into myself, because it may end in blaming myself for all the sins that exist http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif I'm just trying to say that I understand you very well - trust fades away when abused even once... I usually even start feeling disgust towards the abuser... And unlike you, I would hardly keep friends with this person
Maroossia
11-13-2002, 09:34 PM
Hi again, Jon!
Thanks for your kind words. I'm glad you understand me right - and I think you actually need no advice...
May I go as far as to ask you about how many FSU women you actually met in person? Have you ever tried to make any analysis of WHY they could possibly get upset so easily? Were they girls of a high social and/or material level? Did they live in big cities? What about their families? - sum up the answers to these questions and put a few more as well, and I do believe you'll get the grand total http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>[QUOTE= ]I won't date anyone from this site because I've given too much personal information about myself.
</span>[QUOTE= (Jon @ Nov. 13 2002,23:48)]my biggest problem with FSU women (whom I've met so far) is that they tend to be a little "up-tight".
Vicky
11-13-2002, 11:18 PM
"Easily upset with little problems" - that's not the point about FSU women, Jon http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif In a country like ours we are ready to stand up to any problem, and if it made us easily upset, there would be no chance to survive. In fact it's sometimes just the opposite, a woman will encourage a man not to give up. We're having so many problems here that it will be practically impossible to get upset with every one of them.
And the reaction way depends on personality, not nationality or state. For example when I'm facing a problem, I'm becoming concentrated on finding a solution. If that is a problem I can hardly solve - but that should be a big one, and should not depend totally on something I did wrongly, and of course not on the food shortage (sorry Tom http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif ), I'm falling in depression, which does not involve raising up my voice, if you know what a depression is. However, I can't let it last long, as this state does not bring anything good, and of course does not mean a solution. So the only way is to cheer up and go on living. What I wanted to say?.... Oh yes, psychology is the answer to the question "how do we take problems".
katya
11-14-2002, 03:31 AM
</span><span =''>
Jon:)
Every woman trying to be such , as you want to see her. ( of course, if she love you) .
Woman will worry , if she love you. And all, that you can do , if you love her, don
G'day everyone,
Yeah I tend to maybe agree with a point of jon's; in regards to dating women from this site, though maybe I'll take it one step further and avoid trying to meet the lady of my dreams on the internet. Next november or possibly november 2004 i'm going to be in russia, basically as soon as I have finished my part-time masterate degree (taking a looooooooong time!), i'm off there for about 9 months, mainly to a city called Izhevsk where i'm gonna teach english to school-kids for a charity organisation. its always been a real big dream of mine to ride the trans-siberian-express, I have a degree in russian literature so to see up close, the inspiration of my favorite novels and to experience the great expanse of russia will be a dream come true for me. i figure i'll fly from nz to vladivostock hop on the train and a few days later i'll be in Izhevsk. If fate means that i am destined to fall in love with a girl from russia i reckon it'll take place while i am there, perhaps not on the internet. The real value of this site for me is the trading of ideas/ideals, the insight into the minds of the cool russian girls on this forum and of course the humorous interludes when people get real angry with people they have never even met!!! (though i aknowledge that i am the instigator sometimes, sorry katya, matt etc). At the end of the day I don't really have much trouble meeting girls, i'm not jaded against any nationality or culture when it comes to women, cos i've seen enough of the world to see theres good and bad everywhere, and theres usually a lot more good than bad. But in a way i do see the internet bride 'revolution' as being a little distasteful, its embarressing for me to write to girls on the basis of a little photo and a couple of sentances of rhetoric stating they love children and wanta nice home, equally i feel its a shame that there are girls out there relying upon the words written by men who often are'nt genuine. It does'nt seem to put much value on us as 'people'. (Katya; your always gonna get men 'pulling a swifty' on you because you sound so gorgeous)
When i recieve letters from a girl who asks for a stupid amount of money, i'm not really angry or upset, i just kinda get a little disappointed in a world where people are that needy of money, whether through poverty or greed that they compromise basic human values. I'm not too naive or soft, i grew up real hard and kept it going till my mid twenties, now i'm way relaxed, not alot fazes me at all (except when Matt gazes lovingly into my eyes!!!!!!
http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
</span>"Easily upset with little problems" - that's not the point about FSU women, Jon http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif In a country like ours we are ready to stand up to any problem, and if it made us easily upset, there would be no chance to survive. In fact it's sometimes just the opposite, a woman will encourage a man not to give up. We're having so many problems here that it will be practically impossible to get upset with every one of them.
And the reaction way depends on personality, not nationality or state. For example when I'm facing a problem, I'm becoming concentrated on finding a solution. If that is a problem I can hardly solve - but that should be a big one, and should not depend totally on something I did wrongly, and of course not on the food shortage (sorry Tom http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif ), I'm falling in depression, which does not involve raising up my voice, if you know what a depression is. However, I can't let it last long, as this state does not bring anything good, and of course does not mean a solution. So the only way is to cheer up and go on living. What I wanted to say?.... Oh yes, psychology is the answer to the question "how do we take problems".<span =''>
Hello Vicky,
Well I hope you aren't really falling into a depression. I know what it is and it can be devastating. Sometimes people can become very depressed for any number of reasons. It's very difficult to deal with life sometimes and I know it sucks, but you're right that it's necessary to go on living. What are you depressed about? We are here for you if it's possible for us to help.
Maybe you need to raise your voice sometimes to be heard, but that's different than just making noise. http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
Feel free to raise your voice to me anytime. I usually smile and say ok, do you feel better now?
Take care,
Jon
</span>[quote=Jon,Nov. 13 2002,23:48]
Jon:)
Every woman trying to be such , as you want to see her.
This is Tim. This is my first and last instalment on this forum. I have been reading these threads and have been the "fly on the wall", so to speak. It saddens me that as an educated lot present here, we still feel the need to tear each other apart. Is this not a place where people can meet and talk freely and not have their brains beaten out, verbally!!! You have one gentleman talking about sodomizing another. In very graphic detail, I might add! You have a Mosocwvite who says she is not interested in arrogant people from Moscow, judging another guy who had a tete de tete with a girl from Thailand. I was happy that this guy found who he was looking for. Why can't you guys be happy. Yes, he swears, but you don't know him from Adam. How can you judge him? You have one guy from Holland judging another guy from Turkey. I see not benefit in that!!!!! Maybe that is why Vicky is sad, because she is trying to do a service here and there is so much "infighting" it is not funny. I feel for you Vicky, I turly do!!! It must make anyone sick to see some of the garbage being posted. You have the "biker"gentleman give another school teacher a hard time about English and this guy has not even graduated from high school. It truly shocks me that people from all walks of life cannot get along. Everyone wants to be loved and to be wanted. Why not help each other out and be friends with each other instead of tearing down people so you can get a laugh. I always thought that good humour was laughing with someone, not AT them!!!! There was one fellow who had asked, "where was Astralkhan," because he had made an aquaintance there. I have not seen any response to his question!!! Why?!!! This site is supposed to be about helping people, am I right?!!! Katya, and Vicky, have very lucid points about this dating regime in Russia. They are wise beyond their years. Let these women talk!!!! They know more than you guys do. I don't agree with the one guy that swore at Moscovite Lady. But in all fairness, mame., you were not exactly an angel yourself. I believe Vicky tried to tell you not to be provocative and you were. It is a shame, because there could be so much positive feed-back that can come from this site if people would respect other people's feeling. That includes you Juneau!!!!!!!! The smartest thing I have seen come form this web site (besides what Vicky and Katya have to say) was the question by Olga, Why can't we get along, why is there so much fighting?!!!!! Very poigniant observation!! I hope in the future, you guys can learn to get along a little better. Please, keep nationalities out of this. Nationalism is probably the single most contributing force to wars and unrest in the world. We are a global village, now. It is time we start behaving in such a manner. Just another Canuck from London... Ontario... Planet Earth. Peace all!!!!!!!
Hello Tim,
I'm sorry to see you leave in such a manner. I do agree with you and it saddens me also that this site had become a battle ground for nationalities and male egos. I take what you said to heart and am staying out of the fray when it has nothing to do with learning about FSU women.
I was the guy from Holland who made a generalist remark about Turkist men. I was also the guy who ate a lot of crow and apologized to Can for my remarks. I am not in a turf war with men on this site about who's better suited for FSU women. I am dealing with someone from Ukraine and want to learn more from the (FSU) women there so I can be a better man and friend to my girlfriend. I do make mistakes and ask advice from the women here.
Yes we are a global villiage only seperated by the time and distance it takes to visit each other in cyberspace. Yet it is also this disparity in communication that has kept us from really taking the time to visit peoples in other countries. We can talk and walk like natives in cyberspace, but to actually sit and visit people from other countries will give you a greater insight into how they truely live and think.
Don't give up on us just yet. We are like a young country trying to define our identity and self-awareness. It takes time for us to become mature and reason why we are here in the first place.
Jon
katya
11-14-2002, 03:45 PM
</span><span =''>
Hi , Tim!
We need in Forum , because we don
katya
11-14-2002, 03:46 PM
</span><span =''>
Hi, Liam !
I want to tell you, that you are really good man , and you can understand people. We cannot tell about human , know only his letters. Girl , which ask money - in the biggest nobber it isn
katya
11-14-2002, 03:47 PM
</span><span =''>
Jon
Maroossia
11-14-2002, 04:05 PM
Yeah, the arrogant Muscovite is back again!
</span>[QUOTE= (Maroossia @ Nov. 14 2002,19:05)]"Maybe I'm just trying to attract someone's attention in this way since I can't use my natural charm and body language to make it work
Maroossia
11-14-2002, 04:33 PM
Liam, your decision makes sense... I was told so many stories when an FSU girl comes to a Western country (mostly the US) and she gets so much admired by all the men around.. Everyone wants her and fights for her... (provided that the girl is not an ugly-looking 5'4"-and-180 lbs) A dream!... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif Same happens to a Western man coming to Russia (provided he's good-looking as well and has enough money http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
Maroossia
11-14-2002, 04:53 PM
</span>[QUOTE= (Maroossia @ Nov. 14 2002,19:05)]"Maybe I'm just trying to attract someone's attention in this way since I can't use my natural charm and body language to make it work
Hello Maroossia you arrogant Moscovite
I think your great, do'nt listen to tim and his self important opinions. I love your opinions, and yes there are maps and why didn't the fly on the wall answer the geogoraphy queation? i've been a bit rude on this site but hey I just quit smoking and it seems my feelings get hurt easily. I no longer have any bad habits, smoking is the hardest to stop. i have had to cange my lifestyle to quit. No more coffee, it brings on cravings. I do lots of little things to keep my mind off of smoking and maybe I'll quit for good. I am spending far to much time on the internet to distract myself.
Jon is absolutely right, that is the best comment you made and I would love to experience your charm and see your body language.
I should tell you that it was me that threatened to sodomize Juneau, I said something that is said at work often , its a laugh to us but it is scarry to someone who hears it for the first time, I posted it in responce to his swearing at you. He posted the swearing while I was online so I put the sodomy threat up for him to read and then took it down. Tim seems to be very sensitive, the kind of guy I used to beat up in school.
Liam, that was one excellent post. You are funny and the smartest guy on this site. That does'nt mean that I want to go for a long walk hand in hand but it does mean that i have huge respect for the way you portray yourself.
Maroossia
11-14-2002, 05:39 PM
Welcome back, Matt! http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif And thanks, I always look forward to hearing your comments and you never disappoint me!!!
Gee, I wish I was there to read that sodomizing threat
Vicky
11-14-2002, 07:22 PM
</span>[QUOTE= (Jon @ Nov. 14 2002,09:05)]What are you depressed about?
Barracuda
11-14-2002, 08:21 PM
Vicky,
And this is the reason I love my kerosene lamps, home made battery backups, diesel generator, plenty of Ice Cream in the freezer and satellite television. As long as the telephone company doesn't crash the Central office I'm served from I'm in hog heaven. What is scary is that I work for the Telephone company... http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Barracuda
</span>"Yeah, I was very much depressed today - because of some malefunctions with electricity..."<span =''>
Vicky my friend,
I know very well about the problems with "sudden" electricity loss in the FSU. Its funny (not really) that you had a power failure the same time as my girlfriend. I don't think you live in the same city/country? She was very afraid of the dark and I had to call several times to help keep her company. I liked the fact she needed to hear my voice...it helped to ease the stress of no electricity.
I am glad you're feeling better now. Anytime you need to relieve some stress please write me and I will do what is humanly possible to help. I am always available to help my friends no matter where they live.
The sun will come up tomorrow!!!
Jon
Vicky,
I was seriously thinking of spending some time in Ukraine with my girlfriend, provided she thinks its a good idea. I was actually thinking of renting an apartment in her town for about six months and continue working on another book.
I don't know how to approach her with this idea? She may not think it is a good idea because?http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/rock.gif Maybe she will think its a great idea and a chance for us to know each other better? I don't know what she'll do or say.
I think it would be great because I can work and spend time with her. I could get so much work done in six months that wouldn't be possible here in Holland. I could take the weekends off and see the country, take her to a movie, cook dinner for her, and just be like the guy-next-door.
So how do I approach this subject? I'm off to the Hague tomorrow for my Ukrainian visa so I will have a double entry good for six months.
Thanks for your advice.
P.S. I could also learn Russian!
Jon
Vicky
11-14-2002, 09:59 PM
</span>[QUOTE= (Jon @ Nov. 14 2002,23:44)]Vicky,
I was seriously thinking of spending some time in Ukraine with my girlfriend, provided she thinks its a good idea.
</span>[quote=Jon,Nov. 14 2002,23:44]Vicky,
"...a similar stay of one of my foreign friends in my city, though shorter one, just a month, became the beginning of the end of our relations, as somehow he appeared to be too busy with his own matters and behaved in a much careless way."<span =''>
Vicky,
Am I to assume that his careless ways were with women? What could he be so busy with that he didn't have time for you? If his reason for visiting was to get more acquainted with you, family and country, then why would he become too busy? Are you forgetting to tell us something?
I don't see how it would be possible for me to become too busy. My idea of going to visit would be so I could learn about the culture, people, living conditions, and the most important reason; to be with my girlfriend.
In my humble opinion it is important to know Ukrainian/Russian culture and language to better understand the people. I can only be a better husband and friend if I share some of her life in her environment. It's too easy for us Western men to pull women from the FSU and not really know the people or culture. We need to understand and what better way than to go there and find out?
I don't know if it will be possible, but it will be interesting to know what she thinks about this idea.
Jon
Vicky
11-15-2002, 12:55 AM
There's nothing more actually to tell about that guy, he came when he was having some problems at his home with his own business and instead of enjoying being in my city and being with me, was always busy with thinking how to solve those problems. Once after a harsh phone call he had he was so lost in thoughts and seemed so angry that when I asked what the matter was he couldn't control himself and raised his voice. I must say people around, and that was in the street, were shocked not less than me http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif
</span>[quote=Jon,Nov. 14 2002,23:44]Vicky,
. I did get to know him better, but things I learned were far from what I expected. Not your case, I hope, but he who's warned is protected http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif<span =''>
I think it is human nature to build a perfect picture in ones mind, only to be dissappointed with reality.
Hey Miroossa what are you up to ? have you been busy? http://datingtalk.info/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
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